Why "Pushing Through" Is Slowly Breaking You
"Just push through." It's one of the most socially acceptable forms of self-abandonment we have. It's praised in workplaces. It's normalized in families. It's often mistaken for strength, resilience and dedication. But pushing through, especially when it becomes a lifestyle, is quietly breaking people down.
From an early age, many of us are taught that rest is earned, emotions are inconvenient, and slowing down is a liability. We learn to override signals from our bodies and inner world in order to meet expectations, hit deadlines, and maintain appearances. In the short term, pushing through can look like success. Afterall, you're meeting deadlines, you show up no matter what, and you have a "no problem" attitude. But what is rarely acknowledged is the long-term cost.
What Pushing Through Actually Does to the Body
When you push through stress, exhaustion, or emotional overwhelm, your nervous system interprets it as an ongoing threat. To combat threats, your body stays in survival mode:
- Stress hormones remain elevated
- Recovery is delayed or skipped
- Emotional processing is suppressed
- Decision-making becomes reactive
Over time, this leads to chronic fatigue, anxiety, irritability, physical symptoms, and burnout. Not because you are weak, but because biology has limits.
High Performers are Most at Risk
The people most praised for pushing through are often those who are suffering the most internally. High achievers, leaders, caregivers, and conscientious employees tend to take on more responsibility than is sustainable, ignore early signs of stress, attach their worth to productivity, and feel guilty for resting. What starts out as commitment slowly turns into self-neglect.
Pushing through doesn't just impact the body; it erodes emotional health. When emotions are consistently bypassed, resentment builds quickly, motivation becomes driven by pressure, relationships begin to feel like a transaction, and your creativity and clarity will decline. In workplaces, this shows up as disengagement, conflict avoidance, sudden resignations, or emotional shutdown. At home, it looks like irritability, numbness, or the feeling of being "on edge" even during downtime.
Why Slowing Down Feels So Uncomfortable
For many people, slowing down doesn't feel restful; it feels threatening. When the nervous system has adapted to constant motion, stillness brings awareness. And awareness brings feelings that have been postponed for years. Pushing through becomes a way to avoid parts of ourselves, such as grief, anger, fear, and unmet needs. But avoided emotions don't disappear. They wait.
True resilience isn't about endurance at all costs. Real strength looks like:
- Listening to your body before it forces you to stop
- Setting boundaries even when it's uncomfortable
- Naming what isn't working
- Allowing rest without justification
This applies to individuals and organizations alike. Sustainable performance is built on regulations, not pressure.
When people stop pushing through and start responding differently, stress changes. Instead of something to override, it becomes information. Instead of a personal failure, it becomes a signal for adjustment. This shift leads to better decision-making, clearer communication, increased trust and accountability, and improved health and enhancement.
Pushing through doesn't make you strong; it makes you adaptive, and adaptation has a cost. You don't need to push harder; you need to listen sooner. Because nothing breaks people faster than ignoring what they actually need.
By Dr. Laurie Williams, D.Ms
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